Saturday, February 27, 2010

Apologies. Enough Already!

I really hate quoting the dictionary. But I am going to do it anyway. Apology: a written or spoken expression of one's regret, remorse, or sorrow for having insulted, failed, injured, or wronged another.

So what the hell is going on with the avalanche of Legionary and Regnum Christi apologies for what Maciel did? I am not even going to bother listing them all. These "possum" apologies are all over the internet.

We don't apologize for other people. "I am so sorry for what Jimmy Carter did to all the people who were damaged by his economic policy". Big deal. Even if the current president says it. Now if some economic advisor from that time says it, then he is just skirting responsibility for his own actions.

How much longer area we going to have to hear about people saying they are sorry for what Maciel did? I'm not sorry. I didn't do it. I did do some pretty shady things as a Legionary, but I have apologized personally to the people who were on the other end of my behavior.

But, you say, "Maciel is dead, so someone has to apologize for him." Bullshit. The apology that is needed is from those who have wronged others to those who were wronged. Even apologies from high church officials to victims of clergy abuse make no sense, unless the apology if for what these officials did or did not do.

I don't want any apology, half or full hearted for what Maciel did to me. He did not rape me, but he surely manipulated me and psychologically abused me. I want an apology from those who helped him do it. I want an apology from those who did me wrong.

That is what justice demands.

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

that last sentence has a leap in logic in it. you want an apology from people who helped him do it. what the hell does that even mean? you are saying that maciel who abused you did it through other people (that assumes they were completely conformed to his evil intentions. you participated in the same thing they are participating. you can't expect people to apologize for who they are (IF) THEY MAY HAVE CHANGED.

gsk said...

Let's see: Bullshit, Milking Cows, and Monks.

If MM is "nuestro padre," and the Movement is "our mother," do we really need a degree in animal husbandry to figure this out?

Anonymous said...

Matthew 5: 43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR and hate your enemy.’ 44 “But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46 “For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? 47 “If you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? 48 “Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

For some, no apology will be enough and for others. Those that hate appear to have no forgiveness in them. I pray that you can find a way to forgive and move on with your life.

giselle said...

Anonymous 10:56 -- ONLY when they change are they capable of looking back at their warped behaviour. The fact that they're not apologising for their complicity is because they haven't come to repent of it. They are still in the manipulative mode.

Landon was also, I was also, many who used to be in the Movement were -- we've come to realise that such behaviour is unjust to our neighbour, and so we repent and apologise. We have many, many readers on Life-after-rc who have done the same.

The Legion only works when scads of people enabled MM's machine. We wise up, we leave and repent. It makes perfect sense. No apology means no change on the inside. That's the red flag.

As for Landon's forgiveness timetable, it has nothing to do with "hate."

Anonymous said...

I am a former legionary. I never once manipulated another person as an LC. I had to go through a lot for that, but it was and is possible for someone to live in any situation with a clear conscience. In my case, I had to disregard direct (but clearly morally invalid) orders at times. But on that point, my conscience is clear, and it always was (at great personal cost).

Even so, I do not consider myself "innocent," for one simple reason. It is likely that most if not all of us, down to the last man or woman in RC or LC, may have been guilty, to some degree, of vain credulity; we did not ask all the questions we should have asked. We accepted things on appearances that were not clearly established, and called it an act of faith. Faith, however, is a way of knowing, not a substitute for it.

Mr Cody's post on apologizing raises an important point, but I think it is a point that he misses to some extent. I would expand it by insisting that we all need to apologize for allowing ourselves to be misled by this man.

Aquinas (Questiones Quodlibetales III, 4) insists that those who follow the false opinions of theology teachers are not excused from error. In some sense, we all did this by falling into a whole slew of errors (beginning with the heretical idea that the founder was the subject of "inspiration" rather than "divine assistance" -- although I resisted that one, I didn't resist falling for the LC myth in general). To be fair, what misled most of us was the appearance that the Pope had approved the whole thing (which now appears in doubt, and it certainly appears that JP2, at least, was seriously deceived by the LC, which I suspect may have rendered any number of pontifical acts, including the final approval, simply invalid). But on that point, every one of us should have asked for corroborating information (beyond the tall tale of a phone call on the tennis courts) before making such an important decision about our own lives.

So we all need to apologize, not necessarily publicly, not necessarily to the Church, but certainly to God, only to the extent that our consciences may reproach us, and no further. There is a sacrament for that. The other forms of apology should only come when (1) they are just, and (2) there is a reasonable prospect that they will be understood and will help to heal scandal rather than create it. A good confessor can help us to discern this.

The leadership, however, not only needs to apologize formally for its formal involvement, it also needs to go, and some of its members may very likely need never, ever again be "Father" to anyone in a pastoral sense.

giselle said...

Very good, Anonymous 12:18. The only quibble I have with your comments concerns the age of the Apostolics. The ones who were handed over to the Legion as young as 10 and 12 were so very young that they fall into the category: "Woe to you who scandalise the little ones." MM (and his collaborators) excelled in using the Church to "baptise" their actions and confuse the faithful. No wonder that those who were indoctrinated so young couldn't see their way out for so long.

Anonymous said...

To any LC who has left the movement and believes they are free from wrongdoing, I have a few questions...

1. Did you EVER tell your Superior what was told to you in SD by an RC member?

2. Did you EVER JUDGE an RC member based on SD or confessional revelations?

3. Did you ever charm a woman or man so that you could entice them into the RC or LC?

4. Did you ever look the other way when LC's or RC's were lying, deceiving, or manipulating and/or did you lie, deceive, or manipulate?

5. Did you use the goodwill of unsuspecting Catholics for the financial or social benefit of the Legion?

6. Did you tell RC members to cozy up and schmooze the local bishops and priests and did you seek out those with wealth and wealthy connections?

7. Did you ever slander another person for the benefit of the Legion?

If you can say yes to ANY of the above, you are responsible.

As a priest, you are more responsible.

Perhaps you weren't sexually molesting boys - but wrt to the dirty laundry list of one of the most vile Orders in Catholic history, you are complicit by association.

Anonymous said...

To Anonymous 3:50:

I can honestly say NO to every item on your list. I was in for a number of years (double digits).

It was and is possible to be a Legionary and also to be holy. One did not become holy by following the founder, but by following Christ. I am not claiming holiness for myself in a positive sense, but I can say that whatever sins I did commit did not include the ones you list. Nor any against the vows.

As I said above, my conscience is clear. What's more, I am certain that I am not alone. I know several like myself. But it definitely cost us all a lot while we were in.

Anon 12:18

Anonymous said...

I feel much like yourself as an RC member for a short time and it was costly as well. However, I didn't understand this until recently. We waved the LC/RC flag while many, many, many innocent souls were being victimized and revictimized by the cold, callous, and vindictive (possibly criminal) response b. LC leadership. I cannot sleep sometimes thinking that while I was involved, I saw myself as ABOVE all that, yet I continued full force in my efforts to build the Movement - while the victims were suffering. For that I am responsible and I am disgusted with myself for ignoring the rotting core. While I ignored it - it hurt more people. Shame on me!

Anonymous said...

Consider the following possible interpretation of Monk's version of the story: the monk who pushed the cow off the cliff is the Pope who will more than likely shut down the LC/RC (the cow). The fruit from the RC/LC members efforts to build up the Church while clinging to LC/RC are like the lot of the poor family that clung to the cow(LC/RC) for their lifeline. When our Holy Father "pushes their cow over the cliff" they will be forced to cling to Christ and he will then be able to use their efforts in a purer and more fruitful way. From Monk's version: " “You know Father, we used to have a cow. She kept us alive. We didn't own anything else. One day she fell down the cliff and died. To survive, we had to start doing other things, develop skills we did not even know we had. We were forced to come up with new ways of doing things. It was the best thing that ever happened to us! We are now much better off than before.” I have experienced this in my own life. It is so much brighter outside of the movement. God has great plans for you, LC/RC members, that will be realized once you let go of the "cow" and let Christ, not the LC priests, be your hope!! I look forward to your release!!!

Anonymous said...

I was RC for two years and I can say
"fulfilled" to points
3,4,5, and 6.
I left in 2003 and I still feel like I'm dirty.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous @ 5:28. In my statitstics class, I learned that by removing or adding certain variables in a study, one could manipulate the outcome of the results. If one is clever enough, perhaps to their own advantage. I find that LC/RC practices are much the same. Bible verses, stories, other Orders and priests are used in much the same way. One can manipulate any situation if he is clever enough!

jeannette said...

Anon 12:18,
Hooray! Congratulations on escaping with your integrity intact; we all know that it was difficult for you.

Fr Brian Mulcahy, OP said...

Anonymous 4:51, there's one major problem with your take on The Monk's story. The Holy Father has not done anything wrong in calling for the AV and will not be doing anything wrong if he suppresses LC/RC. Ordering the cow to be pushed off the cliff in the story (and actually pushing the cow off the cliff) were evil acts.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for locating the missing variable in the story, Fr. Brian Mulcahy OP. I'm tired. I think what I find most exasperating is how obvious the evil and wrongdoings of the LC and RC are to the general public and those who've left, yet many still walk through life with their blinders on while waving the LC/RC flag. God save us all from this evil.

Anonymous said...

Fr. Brian - that is an awesome critical point and maybe the essence of some of the problem. Anyone who leaves LC/RC or gives strong feedback is seen as doing something wrong or as we have said many times seen almost the same as leaving the Church or Jesus.

It is so painful for those of us who left to have others think that leaving RC is like leaving the sure road to Christ.

Anonymous said...

"To any LC who has left the movement and believes they are free from wrongdoing, I have a few questions...

1. Did you EVER tell your Superior what was told to you in SD by an RC member?

2. Did you EVER JUDGE an RC member based on SD or confessional revelations?

3. Did you ever charm a woman or man so that you could entice them into the RC or LC?

4. Did you ever look the other way when LC's or RC's were lying, deceiving, or manipulating and/or did you lie, deceive, or manipulate?

5. Did you use the goodwill of unsuspecting Catholics for the financial or social benefit of the Legion?

6. Did you tell RC members to cozy up and schmooze the local bishops and priests and did you seek out those with wealth and wealthy connections?

7. Did you ever slander another person for the benefit of the Legion?

If you can say yes to ANY of the above, you are responsible.

As a priest, you are more responsible.

Perhaps you weren't sexually molesting boys - but wrt to the dirty laundry list of one of the most vile Orders in Catholic history, you are complicit by association."

8. Did you ever try to divide friendships "for the sake of the movement?"

9. Did you ever try to provoke someone to anger so they would go inactive?

10. Did you ever try to cause jealousy between 2 friends in order to break up their friendship when you were THE CHAPLAIN of the school?

11. Did you ever try to "make someones life hell" so they would go inactive?

The LC priests in our section have...

Anonymous said...

"To any LC who has left the movement and believes they are free from wrongdoing, I have a few questions...

1. Did you EVER tell your Superior what was told to you in SD by an RC member?

2. Did you EVER JUDGE an RC member based on SD or confessional revelations?

3. Did you ever charm a woman or man so that you could entice them into the RC or LC?

4. Did you ever look the other way when LC's or RC's were lying, deceiving, or manipulating and/or did you lie, deceive, or manipulate?

5. Did you use the goodwill of unsuspecting Catholics for the financial or social benefit of the Legion?

6. Did you tell RC members to cozy up and schmooze the local bishops and priests and did you seek out those with wealth and wealthy connections?

7. Did you ever slander another person for the benefit of the Legion?

If you can say yes to ANY of the above, you are responsible.

As a priest, you are more responsible.

Perhaps you weren't sexually molesting boys - but wrt to the dirty laundry list of one of the most vile Orders in Catholic history, you are complicit by association."

8. Did you ever try to divide friendships "for the sake of the movement?"

9. Did you ever try to provoke someone to anger so they would go inactive?

10. Did you ever try to cause jealousy between 2 friends in order to break up their friendship when you were THE CHAPLAIN of the school?

11. Did you ever try to "make someones life hell" so they would go inactive?

The LC priests in our section have...

Anonymous said...

To the anonymous person who keeps publishing the laundry list of crimes (we get it, ok?), there are those of us who spent long periods of time in the Legion and never did any of those things. As I stated already, I was in the LC for a long time and can honestly answer NO to every one of your points, and I am sure that I am not alone in that. Again, it was costly, but it could be done, at least for a time. Note that I am not now an LC, and that may be the end result of such a stance, but I still know people who are LCs now who can also answer NO to each point.

I understand that you may be angry and that you have a point to make (duly noted), but you have no right to judge every person who has been in the LC / RC for any length of time just because of your bad experiences. That would be a denial of grace. The further you get from the top, in fact, the less likely you may be to find corruption in the LC / RC of the sort you identify (there will still be cases, but not anything close to the universality that you seem to suggest).